The opening segment between Kurt Angle and Jeff Jarrett is
extremely good. Unfortunately, Jarrett seemed a bit weak in his response. In
fact, he didn’t directly respond to the element of Kurt’s promo that brought
him back to the ring. Wouldn’t it have been really easy for him to tell Angle
that he’s never allowed to talk about his children again?

 

Rock and Rave Infection vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss:

 

Once again Christy Hemme physically interferes with a male
wrestler. TNA goes to the same several wells on a weekly basis. I feel badly
that Jimmy Rave is always on the losing end of matches. He should have a solid
future as a top X Division guy but he’s always getting buried. Meanwhile, Lance
Rock has no discernible skills other than being tall but probably loses 1/5 of
the matches Rave does.

 

Team 3D does a great job putting themselves over. Abyss also
has a great response to finding out the invitational match will be a Monster’s
Ball match. It works well considering his character transformation. Nice
segment.

 

Roxxi gets another Rough Cut. Very nice.

 

Lauren interview Beer Money and James Storm is really
impassioned about how valuable Jackie is. He talks proudly about Jackie and
seems ultra confident. Jackie and Roode recognize the seriousness of the match stipulation.

 

Awesome Kong vs. Mercedes Steele:

 

Kong looks physically dominant and the fans respond
extremely well. It won’t take much for Kong to become a fan favorite. Of
course, I hope that doesn’t happen for a very long time because she’s such a
great heel!

 

Kong gets leveled by ‘Raisha Saeed’ who is actually Roxxi.
Roxxi gets and keeps the mount position and just wails on Kong. Great segment
that will help push Roxxi to the top.

 

Karen’s Angle features Christian Cage. Karen directly asks
Cage which side he’s on. Cage does an excellent job here. Karen, of course,
sucks. Shouldn’t this be a Mike Tenay program? Please? Cage specifically talks
of himself as an unrestricted free agent. He also asks if there are definitive
sides that have been chosen. Karen is, at least, more insistent in interviews
than Katie Couric. I suppose that’s a start.

 

Lauren interviews LAX. I hope this is the excuse to get rid
of Hector as a mouthpiece. Hernandez and Homicide speak well enough that they
don’t need him. Hector, how about ‘blood is thicker than beer’?  Y’know, connect a couple dots once in a
while.

 

Booker T is interviewed by JB. Booker is from Africa now?
What happened to H-Town? I wonder who told the wrestlers to keep bringing up
ratings? It seems very peculiar.

 

LAX and Hector Guerrero vs. Beer Money (c) and Jacqueline
(the losing team’s manager is forced to vacate that position):

 

Hector’s dropkick barely landed above the belt. He pulls out
the Three Amigos and it looks (and feels) very nice. Then a ridiculous commercial
break about 3 minutes into the match. It’s simply insulting. 

 

Homicide drops Storm with an amazing top rope DDT. It
actually looked more like an Impaler than a traditional DDT. Beer Money is
getting better and better at incorporating smooth double team action. Tenay is
attempting to sell STING as a bad guy by saying fans will get an autograph and
a lecture on respect at the same time.

Hernandez’ flying leap is stunning every time I see it.
Undertaker’s leap is the only similar move I’ve seen. Jacqueline is clearly the
difference make in this entire match. She plays her role beautifully.
Unfortunately, it appears that when Roode hit Hernandez with the football
helmet, he really cracked him.

 

The Love In? Sonjay and Val lying in bed. Now, some explanation
of Sonjay’s manipulations. His dad is the richest man in India and Sonjay will
inherit his money. Val has consistently been portrayed as stupid so this works
pretty well. Finally! Lauren calls her Yoko and has been doing a much better
job recently.

 

STING hangs out in the ring and talks about the ‘real’ Jeff
Jarrett and claims the young guys have been swerved. STING portrays Jarrett as
the guy who needs and has needed STING. He’s the reason Spike TV picked up TNA.
STING reminds fans that he could have signed with WWE. PWI photos of Tully and
Arn, Dusty Rhodes, Hulk Hogan (boos and an “overrated” chant), Ric Flair are
presented by STING as people who taught him important wrestling lessons. STING
gives an impressive, MEGA intense promo. Samoa Joe and STING are contrasted as
guys who don’t and do know how to be World champions.

 

Abyss and Morgan are backstage talking about Monster’s Ball
and Abyss’ therapy. Morgan plays therapist and goes over the top in his efforts
to convince Abyss to wrestle in the tag match. This may be the most personality
I’ve ever seen from him.

 

A nice video package about the Steel Asylum X Division
match.

 

Samoa Joe is interviewed by JB. It’s a calmer, refreshed Joe
speaking calmly and wisely. He transforms STING’s motivation from respect to
fear. The contrast between the two is pretty stark. Creed and Lethal show up to
thank Joe and show their support and respect. I was thinking that it felt like
a Godfather moment then one of the commercials was for the new Godfather package.

 

Is Kaz really Suicide? They’re putting so much into this
character I’d like to see it go to someone who needs a big rub. Kaz was already
over and would be over if he just showed up next week. I don’t get it.

 

Sheik Abdul Bashir (c) vs. Samoa Joe (c) in a non-title
match:

 

This is exactly what TNA should do more often. Joe wrestles
the X Division style really well and needs to have more time on TV in the ring
wrestling. After all, that’s his primary strength.

 

I have to say, it’s amazing for me to see a Samoan and an
Iranian-American as TNA’s champions wrestling each other. (I would prefer this
to be the main event but that’s just because I’m old school and think titles
should matter most.) After all, this is the same company that has all its roots
in Tennessee, the same state whose Senate contest in 2006 was almost certainly
decided by a television commercial that attempted to portray the Black
candidate as a horndog for White women. How far TNA has come!

 

The match itself is decent but too short to give Bashir any
real credibility. Joe’s post-match attack is reminiscent of Flair in the 80s
when he’d send messages to future opponents by making them responsible for the
beatings he was about to inflict.

 

AJ Styles has a nice interview with JB. He’s become more
polished and confident, specifically since he stopped being presented as a
comedy character.

 

Booker T vs. AJ Styles:

 

I would like to see this presented as a #1 contender’s match,
maybe at Bound for Glory. AJ and Booker are the two guys who should be in line
for title shots after BfG. Booker because he was in the match last month but
couldn’t make it. AJ because he was screwed out of his title opportunity. Their
match could help set up Genesis in November and further the Old/Young story
arc.

 

Booker and AJ work very nicely together. Booker can hang
with AJ athletically and AJ is physical enough that the size disadvantage feels
neutralized. These guys could do great work in a 20 minute match. Booker wins
with some misdirection in a reasonably clever ending that pushes forward a
couple different storylines. The match outcome makes me wonder if Booker will
be Joe’s Genesis opponent. He can claim that this would be the rubber match of
their series and pretend it’s a series of the same level as Joe/Angle.

 

I wonder if Jarrett’s the one who decided Booker should
carry a briefcase. Unfortunately it always makes me think about Mongo McMichael
and I should never associated Booker T with Mongo.  Wait a minute, my computer recognizes ‘Mongo’ but not ‘McMichael’?
How bizarre, how bizarre.

 

 TP

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Impact starts with a helpful recap from last week. JB does a
better job of getting STING to talk at the start of the show. He actually says
“Jeff Jarrett”. Thank goodness.

 

Samoa Joe comes to the ring with a phalanx of security.  He immediately calls out STING but
instead Nash tries to talk Joe down. ‘Ass’ gets bleeped as Nash attempts to
smooth the road between the two. Joe accepts the challenge Nash suggests for
tonight involving three matches. Joe of course is an idiot so invokes defending
the TNA title.

 

Lauren interviews The Beautiful People and again, they talk
about the 1^st Annual Beautiful People beauty contest.

 

Abyss vs. Christian Cage (in Abyss’ Open Challenge):

 

This is a shocking pairing. I expected TNA to keep Abyss
newly undefeated for quite some time. Obviously, Christian can’t afford to lose
the match. Hopefully they’ll come up with a clever outcome. Cage and Abyss have
a great series of reversals and escapes. Kurt Angle and Booker T interrupt
Christian’s potential victory over Abyss and attempt a pretty massive beatdown.
Angle tries to solicit Abyss’ assistance but of course, he refuses to use the
chair and takes a beating for it. Predictably, Matt Morgan comes in to save
Abyss from the chair shot. Morgan and Abyss are referred to as partners twice
within about eight seconds. An interesting tag match is scheduled. I expect
another schmozz because none of these guys could take a loss this week without
gumming up their programs.

My hopes for the X Division title match have apparently been realized as it will be a 3-way match. Again though, Cornette should have announced this on the show himself. Turn title matches into a big deal. Simple but helpful.

 

1^st Annual Beautiful People beauty contest-

 

The PJB have a fun logo now. Angelina Love is accompanied to
the ring by both Velvet Sky and ‘Cute’ Kip James. I still don’t think Taylor
Wilde is particularly attractive but it probably helps to have her broadening
out her persona this way. She doesn’t seem comfortable in her evening gown but
the crowd is buying it.

 

Sonjay Dutt is interviewed by Lauren. The ‘Guru’ gives a
strong interview.

 

Karen’s Angle features STING. Sad but true. He presses
strongly for a return to respect as his central theme. Steve Borden takes off
his glasses and has no paint on his face. This may be the first time I’ve ever
seen him look this way for more than a second. Except of course, during long
matches when the paint’s been sweated and beaten off. Karen did a decent job
staying out of the way during the interview.

 

AJ Styles calls out Frank Trigg and he responds by walking
into the ring. Trigg calls AJ a hillbilly and runs down his pedigree. Trigg and
Styles are to go MMA at No Surrender. Sounds good to me. I wonder if Trigg is
enough of a draw to bring MMA interest into the PPV.

 

Yet another interview as Cage takes the mike from Lauren. 45
minutes in and one match completed. Welcome to Russoland. Another strong
interview as Cage goes deeply into his past. If this interview had occurred three
weeks ago I might have assumed he’d win the match Sunday. There’s just no build
to that though.

 

1^st Annual Beautiful People beauty contest
continues with the bikini contest. Wilde goes first and looks nice but the
Beautiful People do a great job of mocking her. Since there are three events,
of course, Angelina will win this one. Don West says that she’s done this
before. Tenay goes far enough to say all that’s missing is the stripper pole.
But they bleep the word ‘ass’. The crowd’s chanting ‘Taylor’ but Angelina is a
legitimate bombshell.

 

1 hour. 1 match. I wish TNA could recognize how to play to
their strengths.

 

I hate the name ‘Bimbo Brawl’ but I’m glad the match is
happening. Awesome Kong vs. ODB in a falls count anywhere match will likely be
a highlight of No Surrender. Tonight though it’s Awesome Kong vs. Roxxi
Laveaux:

 

Kong is so strong that she can toss Roxxi around very
casually. TNA seems to be removing the back-story from Roxxi’s character. They
seem to be deliberately calling her ‘Roxxi’ only. I wonder how long they’ll
stick with the Voodoo drop as her finisher. Kong is so strong that simply by
tossing a chair into Roxxi’s head and face she created a huge gash. Licking
Roxxi’s blood may be a great image to use later on. ODB keeps Roxxi from being
Awesome bombed onto a pair of chairs but as Kong leaves she licks Roxxi’s blood
once more. Whew.

 

Johnny Devine vs. Samoa Joe:

 

Devine has so much talent I really expected big things would
happen with him a few months ago. In fact, I’d crafted a fun program for him.
Joe beats him in about 20 seconds.

 

Samoa Joe vs. Lance Rock:

 

We’re going from small and fast to super tall. We’re finally
told that it’s a non-title event even though Joe sloppily referenced defending
his title tonight in front of these fans. He needs to spend a lot of time
practicing promos. He’s been champ too long to make stupid mistakes like that.
Randy Orton wouldn’t screw up this way.

 

Samoa Joe vs. Tomko:

 

Very nice! I’m glad it’s happening this way. Tomko is
presented as a serious challenge to Joe. Tomko looks impressive tonight. He
uses some atypical offense and appears credible enough that even in a short
match, Joe is made to look really strong here. I’d be excited to see these two
in an Impact main event later this fall. Nash ends the segment by giving Joe
his blessing and benediction. Nash is so good that this ends up being a very
sweet moment. I hope they figure out another way to keep Nash on the microphone
consistently.

 

The talent element of the 1^st Annual Beautiful
People beauty contest. Angelina is doing an ‘oral presentation’. Both
commentators make jokes about it. Angelina’s poem calls Taylor a whore and West
laughs about it. They’re performance of Row Row Row Your Boat is Jillian level
painful.

 

Taylor Wilde does a sad but not painful drum solo as her
talent presentation. She wins and the Beautiful People are deeply offended. I’m
deeply offended that this pageant took so much TV time. It was fine but
ridiculously long.

 

Booker T and Kurt Angle vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss:

 

Tonight is the first time I’ve ever noticed how clearly
Abyss uses forearms instead of fists when he punches. It’s visually
transparent. Morgan and Angle both need to spend a little cash to get their
cheap back tats updated. Morgan probably gains the most from this match because
he seems comfortable and credible in this match where everyone else is a World
champ. 3D uses a chair to knock out Abyss. Well, that’s probably the best
ending. A little added heat to their upcoming match and Morgan doesn’t take the
loss.

 

STING salutes the fans as he enters the ring and is roundly
cheered. He calls out Jarrett (in an amusingly old school way) and Samoa Joe.
Joe asks if STING is insecure or threatened. The entrance of Jarrett is a big
deal and he’s referred to as a 12-time World champion. A nice visual end to the
show that introduces a new level of intrigue to the PPV. One could make
reasonable arguments to suggest any of the competitors might win the World
title. It all depends on what Bound for Glory is scheduled to look like. Who’ll
be in the main event there? Will TNA go for a gargantuan match to utilize the
tremendous number of potential World champs on their roster? (I’m thinking of
an 8 man challenge match with 7 falls including Samoa Joe, Booker T, Christian
Cage, Kurt Angle, AJ Styles, Jeff Jarrett, STING and Mick Foley. That match
could be the entire last hour of the event.)

 

The final promo for No Surrender is a strong one. Overall, I
think a weak first hour that is saved by an excellent hour #2.

TP

 

 

 

 

In a vintage promo on the second disc of his DVD set, Dusty talks about being willing to attempt to pin ("the
shoulders") of Dory Funk, Jr. for a $100,000 bounty. Dusty says he’s pinned
Daddy Funk, he’s pinned Terry Funk, he’s pinned Dory Funk, Jr. and “I’d even pin Mother Funker, I mean, it don’t matter to me!”

 

Ah, there’s nothing quite like living on the edge of a
lightning bolt…

TP