Exploring the Intriguing
Author: whodeanny
Every year there’s a new one
A Diallo, Bell, Brown
Ford, Garner, Rice or me
Clamoring loudly
Broken faces on TV
We ask so many questions
But no one’s forced to answer
With sympathy’s short half-life
Soon most are hoping for the noise to stop
And the questions to disappear once again
Just like us
In our lives
And our deaths
© Gayle Force Press 2015
I suppose I probably missed the train by quite a long time
It likely had already flung itself into interstate cruising speed
When I parked the Buick at the end of the row
I walked the interchange of rail and street
Hoping to feel the train’s last evidence beneath my feet
Cursing myself while staring at raised crossbars
Some passengers were sleeping I’m sure
Dreaming of the journey they were on
Misremembering the Wichita skyline
Others would have been tense and restless
Annoyed that catching a cross country train at night
Means sitting where you can not where you want
And I knew she was truly gone now
Though I should have asked once more
Knowing her answer, ‘For better or for worse’
© Gayle Force Press 2007
Today is the day I needed to brush off the car windows, take a long drink of coffee, turn the radio off and remind myself that I can remember how beautiful Indiana will be in just a few months. It almost helped.
So here's a flashback to the beautiful days of August.
FDO
I had a happy ending to my summer.
Since I teach high school I have a wonderfully extended summer break. During the doldrums of February thinking about summer break is sometimes the only thing that gets me out of bed. (Do I hear an amen, teachers?) Even though today is August 6, it’s the end of my summer break. In Indiana that means I’m at a late start school. Nearly everyone else has been back for a week already. I wanted to squeeze the last bit of fun out of my last summer day.
Okay, on to the reason I’m writing this. This summer I’ve spent lots of time playing basketball. I’m a basketball junkie to the nth degree and nothing is quite as fun as being on the court myself. I had one of those catastrophic Bernard King[1] knee injuries a few summers ago and was convinced for quite some time that if I ever played basketball again it would be super casual, probably just some shooting games. HA! My family doctor insisted that I should play as quickly, as much and aggressively as I could. I’ve done my best but it’s been a very long process. I could say that I’ve taken lots of Baby Steps[2] in that effort.
For a while I only played indoors on wood courts. That was a hassle and got expensive quickly. It was also infrequent enough not to be very helpful. I moved on to concrete with great trepidation meaning (deep sigh) almost exclusively to the court <5 minutes from my house where I suffered the initial injury. Month after month, I played sporadic halfcourt games with my giant knee brace on. Every time I got jostled or tried to jump or sprint dig in for a loose ball, my heart jumped into my throat.
Slowly I gained a bit more confidence and became to willing to run fullcourt games. Always with the giant brace, usually avoiding a full sprint and often mentioning my injury out loud just so everyone would know.
Now this summer I’ve moved dramatically from fear to fun. My 16 year old son and I went to the local park to play this afternoon and were joined by some other high school kids and a couple 20 somethings. I usually wear my brace if there’s a chance a real game will happen but today guys seemed to appear out of nowhere so I wasn’t prepped like usual. No brace.
I was guarded by a very physical guy who knocked me down multiple times. Once, he hit me so hard that I went sprawling to the ground, play stopped, my defender apologized and everyone came to check on me. It was so nice to realize that they were more worried about me than I was worried about myself. As soon as I got up, I teasingly declared that I was an obvious target because I wasn’t wearing my knee brace today. Everyone understood I was joking and started laughing. Even six months ago I couldn’t have imagined this kind of tumble serving as a tension breaker but it was. And it worked. The game resumed normally.
And the happy ending? After playing several games I announced that I only had one more left in my legs so half a dozen of us played 21. I was astonishing! I made lots of difficult shots, rebounded really well and dominated the game. I think the next highest score was 8. Playground 21 isn’t exactly known for Tom Thibodeau[3] defense but nobody likes being dominated. It was definitely the best I’ve played in years and happened at exactly the end point of the summer. Nice.
Then I drove home while Jake hung out and played for an extra hour. And there’s the difference between 40 and 16…
I didn’t remember his name
No, that’s not true
Mark Linn-Baker
What a funny, unforgettable name
I didn’t care to remember it
I suppose
He didn’t matter to me
Really this Mark Linn-Baker was just there
Archived in my brain
Alongside Dana Plato, Ken Kercheval
Lisa Whelchel, Roxie Roker
And the rest of the litany of not quite stars
That worked so hard to barely imprint themselves
On my consciousness
The lot of them barely identifiable
as individual entities
Except as who they pretended to be
And like me
that’s the only important reality
The masks we wear for better or worse
Define us and allow us
To define each other
Whether the me you think you know
Or Mark Linn-Baker,
Cousin Larry
The other half of Balki
© Gayle Force Press 2015
When I was a kid
My favorite store had an escalator ride
The magic of which was its mirrors
They were stationed both port and starboard
Encouraging me to look more deeply than I knew how
Showing me a new way of seeing myself
My own face reflected infinitely
Now that I’m sharing the escalator
I find myself looking at
The two of us
Gazing forward and behind
At the future and the past
At the one and the two
Holding both in a single present gaze
When two souls combine
Our identities can shift
Our foundations can be moved
Abruptly, permanently, perfectly
By this new experience of love
This partnering of souls is always greater than
The elementary math by which we are numbered
Indeed the base choices should be altered
For addition generates only the vertical plane
Of one above another
We should speak instead of multiplication
Since it embraces the horizontal plane of relationship
That’s what marriage is
The reason for the multiplication
As well as the meaning
It’s us noticing Us
Behind and ahead
The like become love
The one become one with another one
Leaving a brand new one with two mouths
Sharing one voice
Two souls sharing one breath
The secret multiplication of love
One times one equals one
© 2008 Gayle Force Press
You can feel the changes
As the people begin to move
From Earth’s every corner
Bringing with them hope and will
Knowing their dreams will soon take flight
In the new world they will create
You can see the changes
As the people begin to rise
Loosed from the shackles of fear
Breaking the bonds of ignorance
Rejecting the power of separation
In the new world they will create
You can hear the changes
As the people begin to sing
Songs of courage and strength
New as a baby’s cry
Old as the language of life
In the new world they will create
You can be the changes
As the people begin to build
Bridges from one to all
Forged from peace and justice
Raised on love and truth
In the new world we will create
© Gayle Force Press 2009
Okay. I give up.
I won’t try anymore.
The relentless optimism and best case scenarios; the hypothetical matchups and ‘well, what if’s. It's all over now, Blue and Gold. No more pretending.
It’s time to tank, Pacers.
Maybe there’s still some universe in which the Pacers can win a playoff series but I don’t think it’s this one. Not anymore.
After the debacle of Mo Williams (MO FREAKIN’ WILLIAMS) scoring 50 points on the Pacers, there’s no reason to encourage the Pacers to continue making an effort to win every game this season.
It’s really a shame too. The East this season is likely the worst conference in modern NBA history. The most important statistic is this: Only 5 teams in the East have a positive point differential; only 5 teams in the West have a negative point differential. The Pacers of the last two years would be the favorites to win the whole conference this year.
Except the Pacers aren’t anything like they have been for the last two seasons. Mo Williams wouldn’t have sniffed a 50 point game against those Pacers. The reality is that this group is bad enough that I’m convinced they should begin planning now for next year.
Since the Pacers still have the core of a contending team, they don’t even have to pursue some radical renewal plan. They can back to the top of the conference next year with good health and a couple straightforward moves. Next year, they have a first round pick they should use to get another lottery talent on the roster, preferably an offensive minded wing. Right now Paul George is the only Pacer who can drive to score. They also have three second round draft choices and some easily offloaded contracts that can be parlayed into a useful player. Heck, who knows, Dallas might be willing to do Devin Harris for CJ Miles straight up.
The problem is that the Pacers seem scared to do a short term rebuild. They appear stuck in the old fashioned mentality that every win is beneficial. That’s just not the case in today’s NBA. If you’re interested in winning championships in a place like Indiana you simply must acquire maximum talent through the draft. (Signing premier free agents simply won’t happen.) It’s much harder to get that kind of talent drafting at 15 than it is at 5. (And yes, the Pacers are bad enough that they might reasonably have the fifth worst record in the league this year. They don’t need to rely on lottery luck.) This much is clear.
It is, at best, unclear if the Pacers have the organizational discipline to play for the long term instead of the short term. I don’t think they do judging by Larry Bird’s public statements. The talk of Paul George playing 1 on 1 is frightening. The very worse thing that could happen to the Pacers is another injury to Young Trece. The second worse is his return lifting them to the 7th or 8th seed this Spring.
The Pacers don’t need to be a .500 team this year. They need to be bold enough to be bad for a year. And Pacer fans need to let them know it’s ok.
It’s time to tank, Pacers.
I probably need to thank Mo Williams for proving it to me.
-Franklin Oliver
Okay. I give up.
I won’t try anymore.
The relentless optimism and best case scenarios; the hypothetical matchups and ‘well, what if’s. It's all over now, Blue and Gold. No more pretending.
It’s time to tank, Pacers.
Maybe there’s still some universe in which the Pacers can win a playoff series but I don’t think it’s this one. Not anymore.
After the debacle of Mo Williams (MO FREAKIN’ WILLIAMS) scoring 50 points on the Pacers, there’s no reason to encourage the Pacers to continue making an effort to win every game this season.
It’s really a shame too. The East this season is likely the worst conference in modern NBA history. The most important statistic is this: Only 5 teams in the East have a positive point differential; only 5 teams in the West have a negative point differential. The Pacers of the last two years would be the favorites to win the whole conference this year.
Except the Pacers aren’t anything like they have been for the last two seasons. Mo Williams wouldn’t have sniffed a 50 point game against those Pacers. The reality is that this group is bad enough that I’m convinced they should begin planning now for next year.
Since the Pacers still have the core of a contending team, they don’t even have to pursue some radical renewal plan. They can back to the top of the conference next year with good health and a couple straightforward moves. Next year, they have a first round pick they should use to get another lottery talent on the roster, preferably an offensive minded wing. Right now Paul George is the only Pacer who can drive to score. They also have three second round draft choices and some easily offloaded contracts that can be parlayed into a useful player. Heck, who knows, Dallas might be willing to do Devin Harris for CJ Miles straight up.
The problem is that the Pacers seem scared to do a short term rebuild. They appear stuck in the old fashioned mentality that every win is beneficial. That’s just not the case in today’s NBA. If you’re interested in winning championships in a place like Indiana you simply must acquire maximum talent through the draft. (Signing premier free agents simply won’t happen.) It’s much harder to get that kind of talent drafting at 15 than it is at 5. (And yes, the Pacers are bad enough that they might reasonably have the fifth worst record in the league this year. They don’t need to rely on lottery luck.) This much is clear.
It is, at best, unclear if the Pacers have the organizational discipline to play for the long term instead of the short term. I don’t think they do judging by Larry Bird’s public statements. The talk of Paul George playing 1 on 1 is frightening. The very worse thing that could happen to the Pacers is another injury to Young Trece. The second worse is his return lifting them to the 7th or 8th seed this Spring.
The Pacers don’t need to be a .500 team this year. They need to be bold enough to be bad for a year. And Pacer fans need to let them know it’s ok.
It’s time to tank, Pacers.
I probably need to thank Mo Williams for proving it to me.
-Franklin Oliver
I sounded like an old LP
On the phone with you
Early this morning
You believed me didn’t you
That the January wind
Had stolen the strength
From my voice
And the breath from my lungs
Or did you know
The spasms that afflicted me
Stemmed from the rupturing
Of the cords surrounding my heart
Being pulled in so many directions
How long has it been
Since you’ve heard the choking
Spitting cough bursting in between
The swallowed breaths
Or is it too hard to recognize
When you can’t see
The escort of tears
© Gayle Force Press 2014
Morning comes so quickly on days like this
When the wind itself is so cold
It longs to come inside with you
Wisely, it’s assumed, you stay
That much more tightly wrapped
Unwilling to exchange your wool
For the blanket of snow awaiting you
If you decide to exit your bed
© Gayle Force Press 2015
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